Alchemic Verse

It seems when you’re away
I find so much more I’d like to say
But can’t
When I reach for my phone
I remember why I am alone
And then

Shake head to lose the thought
It falls from my skull into my throat
As lead
So my speech freezes hard
Quickly, coldly knocked back to the start
Shot dead

And I die at ev’ry ending

It seems when you’re away
I find so much more I’d like to feel
But can’t
When I reach for my phone
I remember what I’m being shown
And then
Shake core to lose the love

It falls from my heart into my gut
As pain
Even eating becomes hard
Quickly, dizzy held onto the wall
So drained

And sleep becomes my landing

It seems you never stay
I find so much longing to laugh
But can’t
When I reach for my phone
I remember that you aren’t home
And then

Shake head to try to cope
Love falls from me along with light
As lost
So my mask rises hard
Quickly, coldly walled off tender heart
Hope’s cost

And dream becomes demanding

It seems I’ll need to change
I find so much more I wish I’d done
But can’t
When I check on my phone
I remember that I wasn’t wrong
And then

Shake hands to try again
Connection falls between us cold
As lies
Even hopeful words show flawed
Quickly, sadly release what I saw
Your eyes

And space becomes our branding

It seems I’m on my own
I find so many things to share
But can’t
When I unlock my phone
I remember all that’s left unknown
And then

Shake head to see what’s next
Dreams fall to truth too cruel
To hold
So my mind surfaces grief
Quickly, deeply shatters on repeat
I get old

And love becomes remembering